is that really will happen??

first, im thinking of my past...
im afraid of that moment will again happen to me...
im afraid so much of that incident...
it dragged me into many problems....
changed me a lot from what i was before....

it has been 2 years now! it is still haunted me.....
but lately, one question came to approach me...
are u dare enough to consider it back??
i admit that incident still haunted me but not as strong as before.
i think i am matured enough to bear it again.

but it is not an easy job
suitability and eternity is what i prioritize...
"no suitable no talk"
a mountain of money cannot make ur relationship last-long
a shining and expensive car cannot make me satisfy
because if i have it now, it is not mine fully,
it come from my father's wealth even he is not wealthy
so if someone dare to claim he is wealthy now,
come forward and issue it to me,
i will definitely deliver my point.......

am i desperate because wrote all this?
no, im not..
i can wait...